I've been ill all week with a cough. I have determined that I must have the swine flu.
My symptoms match the profile:
1) Since the cough began, the house has turned into a pigsty.
2) I am starting to troll the internet reading things about Paris Hilton, Christina Aguilera, and Michael Jackson's alien child. Obviously, I have overwhelming urges to wallow in the mud.
3) My swine flu is contagious. When I cough out in public, people squinch up their faces in disgust and look just like pigs. Is this considered pigheadedness? I just know I've passed something on to them.
4) My nose is so stuffed up that I wake myself up from snorting.
5) I have great urges to read The Three Little Pigs and Winnie-the-Pooh and Piglet too to my children.
I looked these symptoms up on the National Insititute of Health's website. Its official.
9 comments:
Melonie, you crack me up! I must have the swine flu a lot, because my house is frequently a pigsty!
Sorry, that was Angie, not Steve. Although he was laughing at this post as well. :)
This is funny! I'm glad you are posting more often...it makes my day!
thanks for your great blog, I need a good read once in awhile.
I wish I was so funny and piggish when I had the swine flu...I was just miserable for SIX (not 6) LONG weeks!!!
That wasn't Ella, it was me!!! (pesky kids with their own email accounts messing up my computer!)
you KILL me.
LOVE it. You seriouly made my day. Just needed a good laugh!
LOVE it. You seriouly made my day. Just needed a good laugh!
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